I got the most amazing phone call today and I was so disturbed by what I heard I thought I needed to share it with you.
My girlfriend called to tell me about a disturbing trip she took to the police station. Her baby sister (we all grew up together so very near and dear to me) had apparently been getting knocked about by her husband of two years. My friend, being from the educated abroad did what any self respecting citizen and owner of a beloved younger sister would do, called the police.
Her first contact in the police apparently told her not to bother coz the police do not handle domestic issues. Her second contact managed to pull a few favours so her brother in law got picked up by the popo. I think the term they used was "he was invited to come down to the station".
Horrid little place on the main land. His whole family had gathered there buy the time they got there. Her sister expected to go down make a statement and have it on record that he had beat her. He apparently had a nasty habit of spitting in her face for goodness sakes.
Anyway, the woman police did not actually allow her sister to finish her account of the attack she Had suffered that morning. She interrupted to let her know the she had not heard anything that was cause for them coming in to the police station.
Then she proceeded for about an hour to give her life story. First by quoting from the marriage ceremony and daring any member of the family to try and put asunder what the good Lord himself had brought together.
Then she told them all about her good for nothing husband who drank too much and stole her money, like anybody gave a crap!!! The story I loved the most though was the life story of the police guy who was there. He apparently had a whole MLK preachy thing going on. First suggesting that gossip was the evil that tore marriages apart (not abusive husbands apparently) then he told them his story and it went a little something like this...........
The year was 1980 something and one day his wife had provoked him so much that he wanted to beat her. In his anger he raised her up and threw her away like rubbish (at this point he did a bowa sound effect). Apparently she was knocked out for a few hours and he sat and watched her in a chair "sat down like a man" he said. When she came to she knelt down to him and asked him "if she had offended him" and he said "yes". Then she apologised like a good wife. He said from that day till today she (like a good wife) told nobody and they have been "happily" married ever since.
My girl could not believe what she was hearing (nor could I as I am sure you can imagine).
Due to the caliber of human beings in our police force it would appear that woman beating and being a battered spouse is normal activity. Reporting it to your family and asking for a better life for yourself is basically bad form.
Shocked, shocked and upset. Thank Goodness my friends family are supportive and understanding and have taken their baby under their wing. What of the poor woman that had nobody? Went into the police station to ask for help and got sent home 4 hours later after the polices amateur attempt at counselling to get murdered by her crazy spouse? What about her?
Friday, October 1, 2010
Happy independence day
So we reached fifty and most of us feel like we have nothing to be proud of really.
We all seem to love to hate Nigeria. Its sad but true. I don't know enough to wax philosophical. My country seems on the verge of something just not sure what. It's either going to explode or we are going to start sorting it out. It seems clear to me that things can't go on as they are.
Most people have posted on FB "ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country" and I have decided this is going to have to be my attitude from now on.
Since I started working as the Style Editor (yes I put it in capitals I am soooo proud of self) at tW magazine (which btw celebrated 3 years in the biz last night) I have been reading the mag and what I have been amazed by is the number of quiet unsung hero's in my country. I am not talking about those that have it easy because of family money or have a big name behind them which allows them to own and oppress many people. I read about a London based Nigerian doctor whose sister died trying to get to medical help (this is not a rare occurrence in my country) so what does she do? She moves to Nigeria and begs borrows and steals and starts an air ambulance service in 3 states (to date) in Nigeria.
Did she moan and tell the whole world what a crap emergency service we have in this country? Yes I know that was me just a couple of months ago!!!! She did something about it. She has improved and saved many lives in the process.
I am more than ever inspired now to do better by my country.
Happy Independence day Nigeria.
We all seem to love to hate Nigeria. Its sad but true. I don't know enough to wax philosophical. My country seems on the verge of something just not sure what. It's either going to explode or we are going to start sorting it out. It seems clear to me that things can't go on as they are.
Most people have posted on FB "ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country" and I have decided this is going to have to be my attitude from now on.
Since I started working as the Style Editor (yes I put it in capitals I am soooo proud of self) at tW magazine (which btw celebrated 3 years in the biz last night) I have been reading the mag and what I have been amazed by is the number of quiet unsung hero's in my country. I am not talking about those that have it easy because of family money or have a big name behind them which allows them to own and oppress many people. I read about a London based Nigerian doctor whose sister died trying to get to medical help (this is not a rare occurrence in my country) so what does she do? She moves to Nigeria and begs borrows and steals and starts an air ambulance service in 3 states (to date) in Nigeria.
Did she moan and tell the whole world what a crap emergency service we have in this country? Yes I know that was me just a couple of months ago!!!! She did something about it. She has improved and saved many lives in the process.
I am more than ever inspired now to do better by my country.
Happy Independence day Nigeria.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
About an accent
Who says you can’t learn anything from television?
I was in front of the television watching a delightful b grade movie called “crimes of fashion”. You know one of those days nothing is on and you stumble upon a movie that’s just starting. Anyhoo, there was the pre-requisite trio of fab, witty intelligent and loyal BFF posse.
One of the girls, a feisty red head if memory serves said something and she used the word ‘about’ but pronounced it ‘aboot’ and I jumped up and shouted “eureka she is Canadian”. Why the excitement I hear you asking. Well it has always been something I am a little ashamed of , the fact that I can’t tell an American accent from a Canadian accent. It used to drive me a little mad. I love the fact that I can differentiate most of Europe....don't knock it. I still get asked if I have an Australian accent by Americans.
Anyway I would like to thank my teachers at "how I met your mother" for endlessly messing with their Canadian friend and tuning my ear in to this.
Now to conquer the Aussie and Kiwi accent and my quest to be a CIA agent is well on its way!!!!
I was in front of the television watching a delightful b grade movie called “crimes of fashion”. You know one of those days nothing is on and you stumble upon a movie that’s just starting. Anyhoo, there was the pre-requisite trio of fab, witty intelligent and loyal BFF posse.
One of the girls, a feisty red head if memory serves said something and she used the word ‘about’ but pronounced it ‘aboot’ and I jumped up and shouted “eureka she is Canadian”. Why the excitement I hear you asking. Well it has always been something I am a little ashamed of , the fact that I can’t tell an American accent from a Canadian accent. It used to drive me a little mad. I love the fact that I can differentiate most of Europe....don't knock it. I still get asked if I have an Australian accent by Americans.
Anyway I would like to thank my teachers at "how I met your mother" for endlessly messing with their Canadian friend and tuning my ear in to this.
Now to conquer the Aussie and Kiwi accent and my quest to be a CIA agent is well on its way!!!!
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
emma Nwawudu superstar
When your friends are doing amazing things you just have to give them props.
My girl Emma N has just finished the most amazing project with Anya Hindmarch UK handbag designer to make a limited edition "Nigeria is 50" commemorative bag. She shot the most amazing pictures and the bags are awesome.
Fact that she is being so modest about the whole thing is blowing me away too!!!
That was my Saturday BTW. Supporting my girl at the launch of her bag at temple muse. Another boozy day. Have to stop I am becoming such a lush.
Well done Mrs N
My girl Emma N has just finished the most amazing project with Anya Hindmarch UK handbag designer to make a limited edition "Nigeria is 50" commemorative bag. She shot the most amazing pictures and the bags are awesome.
Fact that she is being so modest about the whole thing is blowing me away too!!!
That was my Saturday BTW. Supporting my girl at the launch of her bag at temple muse. Another boozy day. Have to stop I am becoming such a lush.
Well done Mrs N
Fantastic weekend
I really have to get photos posted on this blog (when I work out how that goes you all will be the first to know).
I went for the Elite model search 2010 on Sunday evening (working backwards here). Sponsored by Moet, Mercedes, Temple muse and all that good stuff so you know I maintained a happy champers high the whole way through the event.
Forget the models on the catwalk, I have to take my fascinator off to the ladies of lasgiddy. AWESOME. We have not let petty trifling things like no lights, no water and dodgy roads stop us from pulling out all the stops. Being the owner of a single younger brother, I am always on the look out for potential candidates for sisterhood but some of the girls I don't think even he could handle ( and my brother gangsta).
It was a really well organised show. Choreography, the fashion (Jewel By Lisa we salute you) and the best girl won. Could not believe she was only 15 (will be locking mine up for sure at 12). I wish her good luck and hope to be seeing her in my international in style tres soon.
I went for the Elite model search 2010 on Sunday evening (working backwards here). Sponsored by Moet, Mercedes, Temple muse and all that good stuff so you know I maintained a happy champers high the whole way through the event.
Forget the models on the catwalk, I have to take my fascinator off to the ladies of lasgiddy. AWESOME. We have not let petty trifling things like no lights, no water and dodgy roads stop us from pulling out all the stops. Being the owner of a single younger brother, I am always on the look out for potential candidates for sisterhood but some of the girls I don't think even he could handle ( and my brother gangsta).
It was a really well organised show. Choreography, the fashion (Jewel By Lisa we salute you) and the best girl won. Could not believe she was only 15 (will be locking mine up for sure at 12). I wish her good luck and hope to be seeing her in my international in style tres soon.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
v.monologues vs tarzan monologues
Have just spent a pleasant afternoon at terra culture being thoroughly entertained.
It was hilarious and somewhat educational all at the same time.
My fave sketch is still "Sister Ester" who leaped out of her marriage bed to denounce the devils' hold over her body after experiencing her first orgasm!!!! Sister Ester finally decided that her vagina realising its full potential was its way of praising God. She was soon accompanying all her orgasms with a resounding and somewhat breathless "Hallelujah!!!"
There was some sad bits however dealing with domestic violence and war and rape and horrid things like that that brought a tear to the eye (which I refused to let drop as I had painstakingly used my stila smokey eye kit to make my eyes look just so).
There were defo some moments when I did not dare look at my boy. A few mentions about defending your woman against all enemies foreign and domestic....think we had that convo 24 hours before. Then some comments about nagging women that i thought he was laughing too hard about. That's another story though.
I do agree with the producer though, our artists do need a permanent home. A purpose built theatre for the enjoyment of the artists and the audience!!!!
It was hilarious and somewhat educational all at the same time.
My fave sketch is still "Sister Ester" who leaped out of her marriage bed to denounce the devils' hold over her body after experiencing her first orgasm!!!! Sister Ester finally decided that her vagina realising its full potential was its way of praising God. She was soon accompanying all her orgasms with a resounding and somewhat breathless "Hallelujah!!!"
There was some sad bits however dealing with domestic violence and war and rape and horrid things like that that brought a tear to the eye (which I refused to let drop as I had painstakingly used my stila smokey eye kit to make my eyes look just so).
There were defo some moments when I did not dare look at my boy. A few mentions about defending your woman against all enemies foreign and domestic....think we had that convo 24 hours before. Then some comments about nagging women that i thought he was laughing too hard about. That's another story though.
I do agree with the producer though, our artists do need a permanent home. A purpose built theatre for the enjoyment of the artists and the audience!!!!
Friday, September 3, 2010
lack of motivation
I have shamefully ignored my blog forever. I took it up as an exercise in practising my writing and so I shall continue.
Let's just consider it a really long summer break!!!
For those of you who don't know, I managed to get myself stuck in the overseas (England) after my little sisters' wedding in May (waiting on the private jet....best excuse EVER). The trauma of having to look after my pikni all by myself for a month was enough to keep me recovering in Lagos for two weeks. I do not know how my friends in the overs do it.
Every week I think "I am going to get back to writing my blog" but it just never happened and my excuses were flimsy.
What I have also noticed is that stuff that use to really upset me and stand out as outrageous, are now becoming the norm for me.
I no longer rant and rave in traffic. Instead I turn to my crackberry and catch up with all my mates all over the world.
My staff are no longer rotating and getting dismissed over the slightest infraction coz I now expect a level of bad manners from them!!! I no longer blame them.
My driver, the rude idiot, took me to the edge just the other day. I took great satisfaction in giving him a long ass lecture with words to the effect of....." It's not your fault you have no manners. I understand nobody took the time to bring you up right so therefore it's not your fault. All the small small slights you think you are showing me, thinking you are too big a man to help me carry heavy things or help me open doors or greet me properly, I take as a sign of your substandard education and upbringing. Bigger men than you treat me with respect. Bigger men than you can never dare talk to me like you do. So don't think that when I ignore what you do and how you talk it's because I am stupid and deserving of your bad manners. I do not engage you because you are not worthy of being engaged. Its as simple as that. Why don't you think about that over the weekend."
I must admit this did cause an attitude adjustment and get me (shock horror) an apology.
I promise to write more and to post some photos sooooonest. Especially now that I am getting out and about as a deputy style editor for a women mag!!!!
Let's just consider it a really long summer break!!!
For those of you who don't know, I managed to get myself stuck in the overseas (England) after my little sisters' wedding in May (waiting on the private jet....best excuse EVER). The trauma of having to look after my pikni all by myself for a month was enough to keep me recovering in Lagos for two weeks. I do not know how my friends in the overs do it.
Every week I think "I am going to get back to writing my blog" but it just never happened and my excuses were flimsy.
What I have also noticed is that stuff that use to really upset me and stand out as outrageous, are now becoming the norm for me.
I no longer rant and rave in traffic. Instead I turn to my crackberry and catch up with all my mates all over the world.
My staff are no longer rotating and getting dismissed over the slightest infraction coz I now expect a level of bad manners from them!!! I no longer blame them.
My driver, the rude idiot, took me to the edge just the other day. I took great satisfaction in giving him a long ass lecture with words to the effect of....." It's not your fault you have no manners. I understand nobody took the time to bring you up right so therefore it's not your fault. All the small small slights you think you are showing me, thinking you are too big a man to help me carry heavy things or help me open doors or greet me properly, I take as a sign of your substandard education and upbringing. Bigger men than you treat me with respect. Bigger men than you can never dare talk to me like you do. So don't think that when I ignore what you do and how you talk it's because I am stupid and deserving of your bad manners. I do not engage you because you are not worthy of being engaged. Its as simple as that. Why don't you think about that over the weekend."
I must admit this did cause an attitude adjustment and get me (shock horror) an apology.
I promise to write more and to post some photos sooooonest. Especially now that I am getting out and about as a deputy style editor for a women mag!!!!
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